Kitsune
by WookieCookie
Summary: The nine-tailed fox knows there's no hope for them. Even if it's pointless, he still wants to fight for it. AU Un-betaed
1. Prologue: To Cut The Red String

**Kitsune**

_16XX_

_Did you know that? When a Kitsune, nine-tailed fox fell in love with a human... the human they treasured more than life itself would die in seven days? That everything they had gone through to be together would be just for nothing but a forever 'goodbye' in the end._

_The Kitsune thought it was just a tale shared and whispered by his own kind... that none of it would come true and he'd live happily with his human. No, he believed in it. He just refused to accept it. _

"_I'm sorry..." the fox whispered to his human's ear, his silver furry tails swishing gently behind him, creating a soft and gentle sound of breeze. He looked out through the window and narrowed his eyes pitifully. The silver snows were falling over the quiet village, covering the whole village that nestled near the mountains with pure and untainted carpet of white, a coldness radiated from its surroundings. _

_It was too quiet. Not even a sound of human voice, the chattering of nature, or even the laughter of children. They were all hiding from his presence, fearing his existence and whishing for nothing else but for his departure. But he couldn't leave, not yet. Not when his human was dying because of him - because of his selfish feeling called love. _

"_I'm sorry..." He repeated again, grasping the human's weak hand tightly. His human raised his hand to his porcelain face and weakly caressing the fox's cheek with the back of his hand. "There's nothing to forgive... I never regretted this... and you know that." He smiled warmly. _

"_I know." That was why he felt like he was nothing but a monster. There was nothing he could do but to watch his precious human lying on the white cloth of cushion on the floor. "I don't want you to go." The fox let his blue tears, shimmering like a diamond with a color of ocean, to fall on the human's face. _

"_Don't cry..." his human wiped his tears. "It's going to rain if you cry." And it did. The rain was pouring heavily as if it the sky wanted to share the pain and guilt with the nine-tailed fox. "Please... please stay..." the sound of rain hammering to the roof of the hut they were staying overwhelmed the fox's helpless cry. He slid his tattooed arm around the human's waist and brought the fragile body to his chest; he spread his tails and covered the human from the wintriness of the world. _

"_To the god that I despise." the fox trembled from the force of his tears, __"__The crow has flown away, swaying in the evening sun, a leafless tree. Over the wintry forest, winds howl in rage with no winds to blow." The fox smiled to himself and bent down to capture the trembling lips of his human. The message had been sent. Now his human would live, in exchange of the memories he had of him._

_After this, he never existed in his human's heart. He would forget everything. Their first kiss, their first confession and their first night together. "Zero..." his human mumbled, blinking at him in confusion. The fox never wanted this, but it was better for the human to live without him then to die for nothing because of him._

"_I'll come to you one day..." the fox promised and let go of the human's hand. _

"_I'll find you..." the human swore before his eyes slowly closes and succumbed to the realm of unconsciousness. When he woke up, the memories of his silver nine-tailed fox would be no more. _

"_I love you Kaname..." Just like that, everything was over. The fox stood and held back the tears that threatened to fall, with one last glance to his lover... past lover. Without trace, without noise... the Kitsune left._

**X_X**

**Written by Wookie.**

**I made everything up. The part where Kitsune's lover will die in seven days in he falls in love and the part where it will rain if Kitsune cries. **


	2. I: To Him Who Forgets

_I told you I'd come to you one day. But I wondered if you still wanted me to be by your side. _

-o-

"It's raining again." Kaname looked at the sky that was hued with darkness through the window from his room. He sighed deeply and stood up from the armchair, heading towards the kitchen to give a surprise hug to his lover.

A smile crept to his face when the back of his lover came into the view. "Looks like we have to cancel today's date." He snaked his arms around her slim waist, tracing kisses to her neck and shoulder. "I know." Yuki chuckled and continued cutting the butter cake despite the tingly sensation when Kaname fondly brushed the strands of her hair.

"I missed your short hair. You looked cuter like that." Kaname sighed, released her waist, and sat on the nearby chair. He stared at Yuki's slender form adoringly. He had been together with this special girl for years and although there were moments when they had a fight, having Yuki in his life was the greatest thing that ever happened to him.

"Ah? Does that mean you're going to love me less now?" Yuki walked towards the dining table with two plates in her hands. She put the first plate in front of him, sparing a playful wink at Kaname. "Never going to happen." Kaname took the fork next to the plate and cut a small piece of the cake.

Yuki sat on the other chair and smiled weakly at her lover. "I hope so too..."

-o-

It may be just him, but Kaname noticed that whenever he was with Yuki, it started to rain. If he watched the dark sky and listened to the sound of the rain falling onto the earth, it felt as if someone was crying.

_2: 13 am_.

Kaname rolled his eyes at the clock, lying languidly on his bed. This place seemed empty when Yuki was not around to scold him to clean his room or maybe just spending more time with him. He'd offered her to stay for the night but she had politely refused, telling him that her father would be worried like there was no tomorrow. Because Kaien Cross couldn't see Yuki as anything but his little, sweet, cute and defenseless daughter. Yeah, he understood Yuki's pain of having an overprotective father.

And Kaname... Kaname didn't really had a good relationships with his parents. Not when he found out his mother had an affair with his uncle and his father wasn't bothered by it since he was more dedicated to his work. He raised his own self and the moment he graduated from the school, he left the Kuran mansion, never turning back. His life was better this way. That was when he met Yuki, first day working at the Cross Café. He smiled at the thought. Yuki had called him 'mysterious yet charming man'.

'_Can't sleep. Maybe I should-'_

A knock on his glass window made the brunette hastily stood and turned around. He expected a bird accidentally hit the window or maybe just something else that had created the knocking noise. He was not expecting a figure of_ human_, looking at him through the other side of the window. He would scream if he could. Especially when he was on the 13th floor and the figure was floating in front of his window.

"_Kaname..."_ his eyes widened. The - the - the ghost knew his name! He kept scrutinizing the ghost's feature. His eyes were dark velvet with a silky and white long hair that reached the ghost's ankle - white fox ears and glimmering silver tail - no, actually nine tails behind the creature's back. He was wearing a... white kimono with a black rose at the top of the folded layer of the kimono.

If he wasn't in shock, Kaname would admit that the ghost was truly beautiful. A flawless creature.

"_Kaname..."_ A tear from the _ghost_ and it was... raining again. Kaname narrowed his eyes, taking a step back. He closed his eyes, whishing and praying it was just a nightmare. It had to be, none of this made any sense.

"-you." He shot his eyes open at the sudden coldness to his cheek. He didn't expect this too. He didn't expect the ghost would be in his room - standing in front of him and caressing his cheek. _Run run run!_ He wanted to, but everything stopped when the beautiful ghost closed the distance between them and kissed him.

It didn't hurt when the cold lips met his warm ones.

He was confused of himself when he didn't push the ghost away, but he was more confused at the throbbing feeling inside his heart when he saw the diamonds tears streaming down from the creature that was holding him.

Deep down he knew even if he refused to accept it - _Kaname closed his eyes and encircled his arms around the ghost's waist, savoring the kiss _- that the beautiful ghost seemed so familiar.

**X_X**

**Written by Wookie**

**Because I'm stubborn and want to continue this. So sorry if this annoys anyone ^^;**


	3. II: In Silence As In Dark

_It was just a dream._

Kaname groaned and his eyes fluttered open only to find them filled with tears as it streamed uncontrollably down to his cheeks. He blinked it away and quickly sat up on his bed, holding the cloth to his chest tightly. He didn't understand, why did he cry? The tears fell without his consent.

He had a nightmare but he couldn't remember much except the white color and the scent of spider lily flower. That was all. No matter how hard he tried to remember, nothing came to his mind. It bothered him because the nightmare felt so... real.

_Cold_. Kaname touched his cheek. It was cold, just like the feeling of your bare feet touching the snow.

"Kaname?" he eagerly faced the owner of the sweet voice, the voice he knew who it belonged to. "Yuki?" How did she- oh yeah. He forgot, he gave her the key to his place months ago so she could enter without having to wait for him to open the door for her. Besides, he used to the feeling of living under the same roof with Yuki even when they were not.

"I called you but you didn't answer. Is something wrong?" She sat next to the bed and captured Kaname's face in her soft hands. She noticed her lover had puffy red eyes and his cheeks were wet, indicating that he had cried himself to sleep.

"I..." Kaname put his hand on top of Yuki's and leaned forward to peck her lips. "Nightmare I guess." He heard Yuki giggled before she released the grip she had on his face. "Seriously? That must be one of a nightmare then." Yuki returned it by kissing his neck.

"Yeah..." Kaname shook his head and stretched his stiff body. Yuki's gentle smile never failed to brighten his day because she would be always be his only sun, the one who would light up the darkest part in his heart. He knew so.

He was too engrossed in watching Yuki that he didn't notice the sky was turning darker and the rain began to fall.

_Because the Kitsune was watching him from afar, crying - the Kitsune learned it was already too late. The heart of his human already belonged to someone else. He wasn't needed anymore._

-o-

The silver fox walked through the thick forest - hands on his sides, tears flowed down uncontrollably and the beating of his heartbeat was frantic. His only light was the luminosity of the bright moon and the blue bead that carved to the centre of his forehead, a blue bead that illustrated his remaining life span.

_If you don't really need me anymore., then where is my place in this world?_ He'd failed Kaname. He promised, he swore he'd come to him. But he was a minute too late when that female human accepted Kaname's feeling. No, he didn't fail Kaname. He did come to him. It was just... Kaname didn't wait for him. He didn't look for him. Still, it wasn't the human's fault. What made the fox think his human would still remember? When one soul reincarnated, memories of the past was obliterated.

Yet... he hoped... even a little bit that his human could remember him. Just a little bit. That was all he ever wished for. Perhaps god truly despised him after what he did before many years ago when he let his inner demon consumed his sanity.

He - he murdered those innocent females. He fed on their souls, mercilessly. Enjoying the scream of pain emitted from his victims. But he changed. He did change. _Because of Kaname, because he showed you there was more to life than just blood and darkness._ Zero stopped and looked at the dark sky; he clamped his mouth and fell on his knees.

The silver fox cried - again and again.

He wanted him to love him again even when it was impossible. He wanted Kaname to say those three words to him again.

_But could you when there was no trace of me in your heart anymore?_

It was starting to rain heavily, the rain pattered and fell on the leaves - the earth and on the fox.

Why was it whenever he cried, it began to rain? Was it because the world hated him so much it refused to let him pour his feeling and his pain or because his tears weren't worth to be shed? Was he that disgraceful?

"Kaname..."

"You failed him, Zenko." A female figure appeared from the behind large tree. She was dressed in gold Kimono that matched her long, silky golden hair. She walked elegantly towards the sobbing silver fox.

"Nogitsune."

"Please, call me Ruka." She made a hissing sound, indicated that she hated to be called 'Nogitsune'.

"Then I suggest you do the same. I prefer to be called by the name of Zero." Zero wiped his tears and stood in front of her, his head still facing the forest floor. Just like that, the rain stopped.

"You can't keep doing this... using your bead's energy to trace his whereabouts. You could die." She lightly put her finger to Zero's chin and lifted it up, their gazes met yet Zero was the first one who cowered back.

"I need to see him, I want to see him."

"You already did. Now let him go. Because if you don't... you know what I have to do." Ruka smiled sadly at her friend. She knew Zero knew what she had to do. Zero broke the rule of _Servants of Inari_. He fell in love with a human and punishment for his treason was only one.

"I've to kill you if you keep doing this." She gave him time to forget about his human, but Zero refused it.

"Ruka, I just-"

"But you know I don't have the heart to do it." Ruka calmly stated and Zero beamed at her.

"Thank-"

Ruka interrupted again him again, "If you want to live, kill your human or your human's lover." She couldn't kill him, she wouldn't. However, other spirit foxes would come to Zero to take his life.

The Kitsune looked at Ruka in disbelief. How could she? She proposed him to do something so cruel like that?

"One must die for another to live."

Zero gritted his teeth when Ruka used her emotionless tone. Ruka was doing this to save him, he understood that much. But he couldn't do it. He loved Kaname, and Kaname loved his female lover. It'd be the same. He'd die if he hurt Kaname and Kaname would die if he killed his lover.

If Zero wanted to be spared from the death penalty, he had to offer the heart of his human to their elder. If Zero couldn't bring himself to do it, Kaname's lover could be the offering as long as that person was important to the brunette.

"Kill your human in exchange for your life." Ruka brushed her long hair. "Or kill your human's lover. I'm a Nogitsune, Zero. My existence regarded to as evil... I have no place in this world and those I loved prayed for my death. However, you still stay by my side, always. And now..."

She cupped Zero's cheeks and kissed his blue bead, the light was getting dimmer. "I'll do everything to keep you alive, to protect you. It doesn't matter what you think, what you'll do. I'm going to keep you safe."

"Ruka..."

"So now choose. Your human or-" Ruka's eyes widened at the sight of Zero, pulling his bead from his head and crashed the blue pearl in his hand - ending his life with his selfless action. The Kitsune's tails started to lose his light, his long hair slowly turned into dull silver.

"**Zero!**" Ruka managed to capture his lifeless form in her arms. _No no no no!_ "Zero!" She shook his body violently. _Please please don't... _ She cried and hugged the body closer to her chest. She couldn't cry for so many years and tonight, it was the first time she felt her eyes soaked by the tears.

She didn't expect for Zero to do that, to kill in himself in order to protect his human. Zero could choose to kill his human's mate. Then why didn't he? She could never grasp the feeling of Zero when he was in love.

"Zero..." She wept. Now, she had no choice. If she wanted Zero to live, then she had to - she looked at Zero's peaceful face. The latter didn't think twice and just took his own life. She didn't know whether Zero was happy or not when she saw the tear in Zero's closed eyes.

_I'm sorry Zero..._

She had no choice but to turn her most beloved fox into a human.

**X_X**

**Remember, I made everything up. None of the legend, folklore and myth are real.**


	4. III: A Fluttering Heartbeat

_If you don't remember me, does that mean I never exist in your life even when I'm always by your side the whole time?_

_-o-_

"There's a price to pay for everything Zero." Ruka cradled the limp body closer to her, protecting the lifeless figure from the cold night breeze. She refused to accept the truth, the truth that her beloved _brother_ was gone. No matter what it took, she'd do everything to change it. She'd return Zero to her side, keeping him safe from anyone that dared to hurt him. _I'll kill your human too if he ever hurts you._

"I hope your human is worth for all of this." She smiled faintly and wiped her tears. With one last glance at Zero's peaceful face, Ruka rubbed his forehead. The spot where the shining blue pearl used to be. "There's no turning back. We both really have disgraced our own kind." She carefully laid Zero in the middle of the forest floor and put both of his hands above his head.

Sharp canines elongated from her mouth as the golden female hesitantly kneeled down in front of Zero. She took Zero's wrist and brought it to her lips. "I'll be there for you, forever." Ruka brushed the silver bangs affectionately before her canines punctured into Zero's skin, drawing a small amount of red nectar. Ruka drew back and stared at the bite marks. A seal, a tattoo with a shape of a moon began to form on Zero's left wrist.

"I'm not Shin'sho Zaku Kegonkyō Omi Shiki, Zero. With my current strength, I can only give you a few months as a human. I'll find a way to help you." _Shin'sho Zaku Kegonkyō Omi__ Shiki_, their creator and a superior being who could erase their existence as if they were just an insect. Ruka hated _him_ and it was for reasons she wouldn't share.

Ruka bent down and pecked Zero's forehead. She'd created a symbol of _Tsuki_ on Zero, the only thing a creature like her could do. By doing it, she could keep the fragment of Zero's memories and his shape shifting ability intact. Zero was not an immortal anymore and he could die by just a normal disease like any humans. That meant, Ruka had to work harder than before to protect Zero.

But on the bright side, Zero didn't lose his memories and he'd still remember about her, about everything. That was all that mattered to her right now. Because a life without Zero... because - because a life without Zero would be empty and she'd have no reason to live anymore.

Ruka stood up and intertwined her fingers. She closed her eyes and chanted an ancient hymn, an ancient hymn that was taught by their elder when they were still a newborn. The tone of the hymn was soft, flowing and tuning freely as it became one with the wind around her. _This better works..._

Her voice got higher and softer, a figure of a female praying to the maker that she hated. It was weird how she hated _him _for making Zero's life miserable like this, yet she still prayed and begged to _him_ that _he_ would do everything in _his_ power to bring Zero back to her.

"_Kitsunetsuki_."

Ruka whispered and stopped her chant, still closing her eyes.

_Thump Thump_

Her eyes snapped open; she almost jumped from the place where she stood. _D-did it work?_

_Thump Thump Thump_

She could hear the sound of Zero's heartbeats. '_There's a hope... there's a hope_.' She cried again and hastily crouched next to Zero and held his hand. "Zero? Zero..." She lifted his head and put it on her laps gently. "Please Zero... open your eyes. Please..." She pleaded and kissed the back of his knuckle. "I'm here... please!" she sobbed and her gaze never left Zero. Colors returned to Zero's skin, he wasn't pale like before anymore. And the warmth - Zero was very warm.

"Please...just..." She rested his palm on her cheek.

"R-Ruka?"

She lifted her head and stared at the blinking boy. Zero was giving her a confused look and his long hair - it wasn't long anymore. _It was short_, Ruka blinked. Unexpectedly, Ruka jumped, forgetting Zero's head on her laps and _squealed _loudly. She gripped both of Zero's hands and pulled him up. She didn't hesitate to spin Zero around despite his still frail and tired body.

"You're alive! You're alive! You're alive!" She hopped and hugged Zero, making them both fell to the ground with her, on top of the boy. "You're alive..." She pinched Zero's cheek and kissed his forehead.

"Ruka-"

"No no! You can call me 'My dear beloved sister', I don't care!" And she squealed again while dancing in circle, ignoring Zero when the boy was staring dumfounded at her.

"Ruka-"

"Short hair fits you!" She exclaimed.

"Ruka, listen. What did you do?" Zero observed his own body. It felt weird. Like - like he was normal and defenseless. He felt -...oh no. No way! Zero turned to look at the still happy Nogitsune. "Ruka! Did you do what I think you just did?" He never thought she'd go that far.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She removed her silk veil and warped it around Zero. "I told you before." She returned to her old self, the one with eerie and dangerous aura floating around her. "I'll do everything to keep you alive, to protect you. It doesn't matter what you think, what you'll do. I'm going to keep you safe."

Zero nodded weakly.

"I'll explain to you everything later. But right now..." She grasped Zero's hand and smiled lovingly at him. At least her most precious _brother _still alive. "I'm going to help you get your worthless and pathetic human back."

_Oh yeah... and that bitch! That bitch that stole Zero's human away from him. ohh...she's going to enjoy killing her. Tortu-_

"Don't even think of hurting Kaname's lover." Zero glared at her.

"...fine."

Zero sighed deeply. He couldn't believe Ruka had forced him to become a human, he didn't want this. It wouldn't change everything, he might be a human. But Kaname's heart only for the female named Yuki. Nothing he did would change it, he just knew it.

"I don't even know what to do Ruka..."

She shook her head. "Simple. Look at the human in the eyes and tell them, you're human." She said as they walked side by side, out of from the thick forest.

She stopped and spun when she noticed Zero didn't follow her anymore. "What's wrong? She asked him, Zero was standing while looking at his trembling hands. His eyes narrowed in disbelief.

"I really am a human..." he wasn't the first Kitsune that was turned into a human. Several Kitsunes were turned into a human too in the past. But it was a punishment, their immortalities were taken from them for the sins they had committed. Yet he... Ruka changed him for a different purpose. It was to safe him.

"Thank you Ruka..."

"For what? Turning you into a human?"

"For always be there for me."

Ruka beamed and captured Zero's chin. "Anything for you." She lightly kissed his head and embraced the boy. Her protective instinct was getting stronger every time she was with Zero.

**X_X**

**Written by Wookie.**

**I think everyone knows who ****Shin'sho Zaku Kegonkyō Omi **_**Shiki**_** is. **


	5. IV: The Sound Of Pattering Rain

_16xx_

"_Why did you do that?" The Kitsune looked at the human kneeling in front of an injured cat in front of him, his arms crossed to his chest and he let his tails hovered his body to cover himself from the falling snow. He couldn't understand the purpose of being kind to someone or something that didn't deserve it, especially if they wouldn't give anything to you in return. Humans were truly an unpredictable creature._

"_Do what?" He asked and fed another piece of a leftover meat he had to the fluffy cat, a smile graced his face when the cat mewled and brushed its body to his legs. Perhaps a sign of gratitude from the animal?_

_The spirit fox sighed, "Never mind." He spun on his heels and decided to leave when the human's voice stopped him. "I saw you. In the forest... when you were with that young girl." He spoke with such calmness as he stood and shivered by the icy breeze of the winter. He blinked at the sudden feeling of warmth surrounded his body. The human looked behind him and found the kitsune's tails were all over him, shielding him from the cold temperature._

"_So?" The fox rolled his eyes, still not looking at the human, which made the human laugh at the Kitsune's pouty expression that he thought to be... adorable._

"_I was there, I thought you were going to kill that innocent girl and devour her soul like any other fox spirits do. But you didn't, you let her go and-"_

"_I don't want to hear about it." He interjected and shook his head, looking at the darkened sky. Was it fine for a human to be out here in this kind of weather? _

"_Of course." The human chuckled and turned to stare at the silver fox's flawless feature. To other, Kitsune or fox spirit was regardless as dangerous, evil and full of deceitful. But to him, to Kaname, Zero was his forever beautiful angel. _

_Even when he treated him harshly, Kaname knew better that Zero was struggling to show him that the fox truly loved him. Zero loved him enough to break the rules and vows of his own kind to be with him. To let himself fell in love with him._

_The day he met Zero was the same like today, cold - falling and colorless snow, a hidden meaning behind the pure white. It was as if Zero was one with the snow. One with something that could slip through his fingers even how hard and tightly his tried to hold it, never to let go._

_He grew to love Zero the very first time he saw him, and he fell deeper at the sight of Zero crying. Never had he thought someone could look beautiful when their face was covered with diamond tears. It was heartbreaking, yet, it was also the most angelic thing he'd ever seen in his life._

"_Zero, I love you." Kaname kissed the blue pearl on Zero's forehead._

"_D-don't say something so openly like that!" he blushed, turning his head away and hid his face in Kaname's chest._

"_I love you." Kaname smiled and captured Zero's chin between his fingers, browns orbs gazed lovingly into the velvet ones. "I love you." He repeated and sweetly kissed the pale, supple lips offered before him._

"_I love you too Kaname..." Forever. _

_...Forever because immortality was his curse._

"_Kaname."_

"_Mmm?"_

"_When you die, what will happen to me?" Zero questioned bluntly, nuzzled his ears to the taller boy's broad chest._

_Kaname didn't reply him, he didn't move or smile at him. Kaname just inhaled the scent of his lover and stayed quiet._

_Zero willingly accepted the silence as his answer. The same question he had been asking since the first time he knew he was in love with him. Kaname never answered though, he would do the same thing. He hid his face in his hair, as if he was thinking, praying for something that Zero could never decipher. _

_But the truth was..._

_Zero never wanted an answer and he knew he'd never get one._

-o-

"-But then Yori said it was not for her to decide the-... Kaname? What's wrong?" Yuki's cheery tone dropped instantly at Kaname's distressing look. She shifted on her seat, uncrossed her leg under the round table and leaned forward to touch his cheek. Oddly enough, Kaname flinched and gave her a stun expression as if he didn't notice her presence the whole time and just aware of it when she caressed him.

"Yuki, I'm sorry. I was just...thinking." Kaname leaned into the chair he was sitting on, scrutinizing the white ceiling and closed his eyes, blocking unnecessary sounds from his head. He should treat Yuki better since he was the one who asked her to come meet him when she was busy helping her friend. However, with her tight and busy schedule, Yuki still agreed to meet him at the nearest café at her place. Yet he didn't pay any attention to her.

"Thinking? About what?" Yuki tucked her long hair behind her ear, smiling sweetly at her lover. _Kaname is being quiet and distant lately._ She looked down at her hands, her look was of worry and hurt. It almost felt like Kaname wasn't there even though he was so close to her. Was there something or someone out there that was more important than she was? Yuki wondered if it was true because she was having that kind of feeling lately.

"I- it's nothing. Nothing important." He wasn't about going to tell her about the dream, the same, repeated dream he had. A dream of white. A white person, white snow, white glimmering...tails? And a smooth, gentle voice chanted a faint but unwavering 'I love you'. It was getting annoying and he hoped it would stop.

"Ohh..." Yuki glanced at him in which Kaname returned fondly. "I love you Yuki." He brushed his finger along her lips, only love emitted from his eyes when he stared at the girl before him.

"I love you too." She whispered shyly. For a moment, her worries faded. This what Kaname's love could do to someone like her.

_Rain._

Kaname rested his chin on his hand and turned to face the outside scenery when it began to rain, the raindrops pattered heavily to the now wet earth. He swore the weather looked just fine when he left his house, the sun shone brightly. But now? Just in a few seconds, it was raining...again.

He furrowed his brows together when he spotted a figure standing across the street. A young boy with a silver hair. He was looking at him with a sad and longing look. He opened and closed his mouth, saying words that Kaname couldn't hear. Kaname felt - ...something inside him was being torn apart.

_W-what is this?_

His heart was urging go to the boy and-

"Kaname?" his head snapped at Yuki's voice, he faced and nodded gently at his precious lover. "It's nothing." He looked back at the boy but he was nowhere to be found anymore.

He noticed something about the boy with the beautiful white hair... he was crying while he stared at him. No no - he was staring at him and Yuki. Like it pained him to watch them so near to each other. White-haired boy...

_White._

His eyes widened.

_White...just like in his dream._

**X_X**

**Written by Wookie**

**I never thought about this before. But since Zero is more than 500 year old in this story, does that mean he's a pedophile since Kaname is just 20++. ^^;**


	6. V: His Shattering Past

Yuki blinked, stopping on her track when a figure of a tall, slender and pale boy stood not too far from where she was standing. But the boy's attention wasn't on her, not at all, it was as if he didn't notice her presence even though the boy was only a few steps away from her. The boy was solidly gazing to the luxurious-looking apartment. _No._ Yuki blinked again, holding her bag closer to her. The boy was staring at Kaname's window.

_Kaname's acquaintance? _

Maybe not, she shook her head. The boy looked innocent enough, fragile too. Still, it was just his outside look. Who knew, the boy could be - her eyes widened when she took note of the boy's state. He was only wearing a white shirt and white pants, bare feet and it seemed there were bruises on his hands. What was he thinking, using that kind of clothing in this cold weather?

She sighed and shook her head.

"Hey!" Yuki walked slowly towards the boy and halted in front of him when the boy gave her a confused look but then it was replaced with fear and - was that guilt she saw in his eyes? The boy tried to run and Yuki hastily stopped him by grabbing his wrist, almost fell down during the process. "You-" she fixed her hair, hand still gripping the boy's thin wrist. She studied his feature. Taller but thinner than her, his silver was disheveled and a few cuts here and there on the clothes he wore.

He was a mess. Not that she accused him of being a homeless person, but he just... looked like one to her.

"You shouldn't run away like that when someone called you." Yuki tried to smile but failed miserably at the boy's trembling form. He was...scared of her. Why? Even if he didn't try to run away, it didn't mean she was going to let him go, not when he looked like he could faint at anytime. "Hey...erm..."_ I'm suck at this._ "It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. It's not like I could anyway." She smiled at him.

And for once, his fear faltered as he returned her smile. "I'm sorry. I jus-"

"It's fine." Yuki nodded. "Why are you here? Waiting for someone?" She knew the answer to it clearly, yet it never hurt to ask.

"No... I..." he stared at the window again, Kaname's window. He bit his lip and turned to face Yuki, "I- I'll go now. I'm sorry." He pulled his hand from Yuki's grasp gently and spared a smile to her, the least he could do after the problem he caused. He could see why Kaname fell from someone like Yuki.

"Wait wait!" Instead of leaving the boy alone, Yuki decided to chase him. It sounded stupid, but she didn't have the heart to let the boy leave just like that. She didn't want to help the boy out of pity, she never did anything to someone because she pitied them, she helped someone for the reason that she knew they needed it.

"You look," She studied the boy again "You look horrible."

The boy with the silver-haired mumbled something under his breath.

"What? I can't hear you." Yuki stood closer and the boy backed away.

"I'm sorry..."

This boy... she giggled. "Really, there's nothing to apologize for. Come on." She held out her hand, waiting for the boy to take it. Now, she really needed a logical and long explanation to her lover of why she brought a stranger with her to his place. "Let's get you clean first. After that, you can go back to your home.

He remained quiet. "I don't have one." There was no trace of sadness in his voice.

"Oh..." Yuki muttered. More reasons of why she needed to help him! Yuki balled her hands into fists as she brought it to her chest, her eyes glistened with blistering determination. "Then come!" She grasped his wrist and pulled him along with her, didn't even bother to hear his protest. She helped Aido when he was kicked out of his own home by his parents when he admitted to them he preferred male.

There was no different with helping...err.. "What's your name? Mine's Yuki." She questioned, still dragging the boy behind her.

"...Zero."

"Nice to meet you Zero." She stared back at the boy and squeezed his hand, assuring him she wouldn't do anything that would hurt him.

"...t-thanks...Yuki..." Zero let himself to be tugged along by this girl, the girl that had caused so much pain to him. She was different than he'd thought. In his head, he'd imagined Yuki to be shy, quiet, obedient and well...everything that was opposite of her right now.

For a moment, she forgot that Yuki was taking him to Kaname's place. And when he did realize, it was already too late.

-o-

"Yuki! I can't! I really need to go!" He attempted to free himself from Yuki's death grip, but repeatedly failed due to the differences between their strengths. It wasn't that Yuki was stronger than her, he was weaker than Yuki. The reason was simple. The effect of Ruka's spell was still lingered on him, making him weak and vulnerable for the time being.

'_So dear Zero, don't go around and pick a fight okay? You still have not gained your strength yet. For now, you still as weak as an infant.'_ Ruka had said it with a grin; she was having fun to know she could mother him since he couldn't fight her back.

Zero twitched. No one was sneakier than Ruka herself.

"I told you. It's fine. It's not like my boyfriend is going to disagree anyway." Yuki promised him.

_It wasn't about that!_ Zero gritted his teeth. It was about seeing Kaname again after for hundreds years. True Kaname had no memories of him anymore, he wouldn't notice anything about him, he wouldn't care and love him the same way ever again. It made him afraid more than anything did. He couldn't bear to hear 'who are you' from Kaname, he couldn't bring himself to look at Kaname in the eyes and all he could find was the gaze of someone, looking at an unfamiliar person.

That was way he never met Kaname before, and he was always there watching him. If he wanted to follow his heart, he'd already see his human a long time ago. Yet he couldn't, he was terrified.

_He was scared to know he was a stranger to Kaname._

"Yuki. Please. I can't."They arrived at Kaname's place, standing right before his door and just with a knock - Kaname would open the door and they would see each other.

_I don't want this._

"Zero, I was just trying to-"

"Yuki?"

Both of them turned around to face a familiar face - a face of the person who Yuki treasured the most, the face of the person that meant the world to Zero.

"Kaname..." Zero whispered and it was loud enough for Kaname to hear it. The other latter craned his neck and for seconds their eyes met - just like that, Kaname said the words Zero refused to hear from the brunette.

'_I love you, Kaname.'_

"Who are you?"

Zero hid his eyes behind the long silver stands, forming a fake smile on his lips.

"It's Zero..."

**X_X**

**Written by Wookie**

**Thanks for all the reviews ;D**


	7. VI: Silent Tears

_16xx_

_Kuran Kaname was not his first lover._

_He'd told the human about his past lover, a female hybrid, daughter of a spirit fox and a human. He'd enlightened him how he met her, how he used to cherish the love she gave him, how being with her made everything perfect. The Kitsune's mind filled with such loving and yearning thoughts when he talked about his deceased lover._

_Every little bit piece memories of her that Zero shared, Kaname held Zero's cold hand, he envied her yet at the same time, he was happy for the female hybrid. She had Zero in her life before she died as a victim in a bloody and massacre war. It distraught the human sometimes, how the girl fell in love with the Kitsune and why Zero would let himself fall in love with her._

_He was jealous, yes. He wanted Zero's first and last love to be him. But that was being selfish wasn't it?_

_Zero... Zero said she had beautiful brown eyes -rosy cheeks - her auburn, long hair passed her waist - high cheekbones - and kissable plump lips. _

_Kaname closed his eyes._

_If she, Zero's past lover were a male, she'd look just like him. _

_The human couldn't help but to feel that somehow, silently, Zero chose him, Zero was in love with him because he looked like her. He looked like someone Zero used to love dearly. What if all along, he was just a replacement?_

_He wanted to ask the silver fox, but whenever he opened his mouth to utter the words, it was swallowed by the way Zero stared affectionately at him and the way Zero would hold him tightly._

_Maybe it was just him, a human with doubts. Perhaps Zero really loved him for who he was. He just had to accept the fact that Zero still lived in the past._

_Shimmying down, Kaname spared gentle kisses to Zero's neck. The fox sat between his legs, his hands draped around Zero's thin figure and his head rested on his lover's shoulder._

"_You should see your face when the fireworks exploded in the sky, it was priceless." Kaname's body trembled by the short laughter._

"_Shut up. How should I know it was a harmless lights and not a-" Zero stiffened. He almost said he cared for the human in his face, knowing Kaname; the latter would tease him until the end of the day. It was not his way of showing his affection openly to someone. Yeah, he was shocked when the fireworks suddenly appeared out of nowhere and just...exploded. He thought it could be a...monster._

_He never knew the existence of fireworks until tonight. Humans and their creations, it surprised him to no end._

"_Ahh...I'm happy to know you're worried about me."_

"_I never said that."_

"_Of course." Kaname sniggered._

_Zero grimaced and soon pouted when his lover was being awfully quiet."Kaname?"_

_An incoherent cough startled the Kitsune, he spun around to face the human and found Kaname clasped his hand on his mouth. His face puckered into a pain look as Kaname tried to regain his breath. _

_No. Zero's eyes widened in fear._

_Kaname withdrew his hand slowly, a trickle of blood on his palm. But why? He didn't show any sign of sickness. _

"_Zero, I-...Zero?" _

_The Kitsune cried._

_Rain hammered down to the earth. The day after that, Zero was not the same anymore. He was distant and quiet._

_As days went by, the Kitsune he loved was getting out of his reach._

**-o-**

Zero fidgeted under the conspicuous gaze of the taller man, his eyes trailed up and down to observe the stranger stood idly before him. Kaname didn't like the way the boy threw his timid gaze at everywhere but him, no, he didn't like everything about the boy. The way he played his fingers to keep himself distracted, the way he trembled like Kaname was the one who would attack him and lastly, and the way he held Yuki's hand.

Kaname closed the door behind the mysterious boy; he didn't blink and keep staring at him suspiciously. Once Yuki dropped her bag on the couch, she turned around to face Zero. "Wait here." She made a 'wait' gesture with her hands and ran to Kaname's bedroom, ignoring her lover when she scrambled for a towel and a new pair of clean clothes.

Zero went rigid. Kaname hadn't spoke a word since he arrived. He just stared, maybe even glared at him as if he was someone who planned to steal Yuki away- it finally hit the now human boy. He spun to look at Kaname, yet his eyes still on the floor.

"I- I have no bad intention toward Yuki." Zero weakly murmured.

"And you better keep it that way." He could feel the brunette's stern glare before he disappeared into the same room Yuki went to.

The snow-haired exhaled laboriously and pulled his hair harshly. It didn't alleviate his whole problem, but it did helped a little.

He was in a deep mess. This was not how he planned to see Kaname again and somehow he never told Ruka about it, Zero wasn't planning to meet Kaname at all now that he was very much happy with Yuki. Kaname's constant and ridiculous jealousy when he held Yuki's hand, it was a proof he truly loved that human girl.

_So far, being human sucks._

'_It's better than death, you moron!'_

Zero cringed, Ruka's telepathy voice drummed inside his head. How the heck the Nogitsune did that?

"Ruka?"

'_Don't 'Ruka' me! Are you sure that's your human? He doesn't look like he has a sex drive...'_

"Ruka..." It took minutes to shut her up, but acquiescence in the end, when Zero mentioned he wouldn't do anything that could harm his for now fragile state. If he could, Zero would ask her how she managed to sneak inside his head. Ruka had many great abilities, but he hadn't knew this was one of them. She kept many secrets more than he did and yet she dared to accuse him of being secretive.

Sighing, Zero patted the couch's cushion; he looked to the direction of Kaname's room before he slowly sat down on the couch. _Very soft...interesting. _He took the liberty to lie down and brought the cream pillow to his face.

It smelt of Kaname... his scent was all over this place and Zero missed it. He longed for it. A sudden noise of something fell on the floor - or someone threw something on the floor made Zero rose and headed toward the room. Boldly, Zero leaned on the door, listening to the low whispers in the room. Judging from the voice, it was Kaname and Yuki...bickering?

"_It's not about that Yuki. It's about you, bringing a stranger to my place! Did you take a good look at his feature? There's something wrong with him Yuki! What makes you think he's harmless? He looks different and I don't like his eyes, the way he stares at me and you!" _

Zero bit his lips at the way Kaname's voice resonated. He sounded desperate to get rid of something he couldn't understand. Maybe it was a mistake to come here.

He heard the creaking of a bed, _"It doesn't matter what you think Kaname. I-"_

"_I want him to leave after he finishes cleaning himself."_ Kaname strained from shouting. He didn't understand it, the moment his eyes met contact with the boy who Yuki brought with her, Kaname felt...scared, defenseless and weak. Like the boy had drained his life. Yet at the same time, he was very familiar. He had to force his body to not take the boy and envelop him in his arms, keeping and protecting this _Zero_ from everything.

It was a foreign feeling and he hated it.

"It's raining again..." Yuki's muffle voice made Kaname look out through the window.

"Yeah...it's raining again."

Outside of the room, Kaname could hear someone weep but chose to ignore it.

_Deep inside, Kaname couldn't help but to feel lonely for the very first time when he watched the rain._

**X_X**

**Written By Wookie**


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